Local Church Instruction
Why not plan a "sex weekend"?
“It’s finally here: Sex Weekend!” So began my introduction to Attica Free Methodist Church back in 2019. Pastor Jerry Badgley had heard me speak at a conference and invited me to teach and preach for an entire weekend: Thursday night through Sunday.
This year, I’ve been posting articles about ministry to trans because that is what has had the headlines of late. But no matter what the current issues might be, the number one best approach for any church is to teach clearly about God’s good design for our sexuality.
And yet for a variety of reasons, pastors are so reluctant. These are difficult days for local churches. A faithful and committed generation has aged and is dying off. Youth have become disenchanted and “dechurched”. Some laity are still opting for their couches instead of the pews. Why risk losing families by tackling ticklish issues?
But this is exactly what Pastor Jerry did. He knew people of all ages needed to be grounded in the biblical view of sexual intimacy. He was in no way too shy to address these topics on his own, but he brought me in as an outside voice.
He scheduled me for every conceivable group in a variety of settings:
· Celebrate Recovery
· The local ministerium
· Men’s Breakfast
· Ladie’s Tea
· Special evening meetings
· Two Sunday morning worship services
· And an evening youth rally of three local churches
The varied venues made possible opportunities for prayer with many individuals. Abuse victims found comfort; porn addicts received encouragement; and a man who secretly struggled with same-sex attraction was relieved to have an hour to talk freely and pray.
A long and tiring weekend, but God showed up. It was sweet!
Pastors are gatekeepers. After 35 years of ministry, I absolutely understand that. We rightly want to be the one to guide our people through the contentious issues of the day. But there is something to be said for bringing in a specialist.
Garry Ingraham is a good colleague of mine who speaks at churches several times a month. He leads a tremendous ministry called Love and Truth Network, which provides both information and transformation. Just recently his autobiography was published: Am I Gay?: Coming out of Cultural Christianity & LGBTQI Identity into Authentic Faith in Jesus. Just bought my own copy and hope to give a summary for this blog soon.
Garry’s life experiences, training, and ministry expertise qualify him for any number of venues. He will fearlessly and compassionately teach and preach with all of the precision of a heart surgeon—an apt metaphor as it is the hearts of the current generation that are at stake.
As Tsunami Surfers, we are looking to rescue those caught in the debris of the cultural chaos and internet miasma. If an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, a tidbit of sound teaching is worth a truckload of therapy.
The occasional sermon is necessary but likely far from adequate. In the past, I’ve recommended a variety of books which would serve well for small groups authored by Juli Slattery, Christopher Yuan, and, uh, me!
When I was teaching as an adjunct at Ashland Seminary, I required students to read Theology of the Body for Beginners by Roman Catholic scholar Christopher West. It is an easy-to-read interpretation of the teachings of Pope John Paul II on sexuality. Yes, you won’t agree with everything he writes. We are always to read with discernment. But getting people reading, discussing, and learning from Christian leaders has enormous value. Otherwise, Hollywood and social media become the guide for many.
There are so many good resources out there and more are in the making. If you want specific recommendations for specific topics or for certain audiences, reply to this email and ask me. But be actively engaged in seeing God’s word on this topic taught, discussed, and applied in the local church.
Pastor Jerry’s ministry in Attica, IN, has been one of unashamed evangelism combined with an incredible compassion for the last, the least, and the lost. Once a small congregation, it now flourishes with all manner of need-meeting ministries. Among other things, they man a thrift store, a recovery house for men, an early learning center for kids, and ministries for those in recovery.
Not long after he arrived, his small Free Methodist congregation began to host a Narcotics Anonymous meeting in their basement. Attendees got quite a kick out of the old wooden folding chairs being used. On the backs were spray painted the words “Free Meth”. Not sure if that caused confusion for some, but it certainly brought laughter from most!
May God guide your own congregation in studying his design for our sexuality—not so that you can defend a theological castle, but to be the healing hands of Jesus among the sexually broken.